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Question Title	Posted By	Question Date
re: being cursed	Lisara	Sunday, January 15, 2012
Question: Happy New Year--I pray you are well and only getting better! The person who wrote you this e-mail is my husband. I want to clarify and expand on his e-mail AND I thought I would ask you something in regards to this. It is a bit embarassing to just assume it is "a curse" right off the bat. First of all my husband is extremely unimaginative AND forgetful, and this time I say this in his defense---he only likes facts, eventhough he does go have faith and goes to church regularly. We have been married 22 years. We have lived through 22 years of many financial trials (extortion, scams and cons, theft by clients and co-workers, foreclosures), which sounds mundane, but along with bad health, family problems ( I have written about them), and he is losing most of his teeth ewhich we can't afford to fix. There are a whole host of other things, but I CAN'T write them. He seems to put them out of his mind as a defense-mechanism. I can't though I wish I could. Now please understand, we NEVER (neither he nor I) wanted to ever believe in a "curse". The idea had been planted in our consciousness about 15 years ago by his Mom and Dad, and even my parents. We thought it was hogwash, and superstition. His Mom though had an "herbal shop" for many years which attracted many superstitious and magic practioners. They regarded her as a "guru" which she denied as a fact; she never regarded herself as such. It was well-known that her son was(is) a lawyer, and she always feared people would envy this and hurt him. He ALSO had clients that were visitors of his Mom's shop. One even told him 15 years ago that she "would make sure he never had a good business". We resisted ALL of Mother-in-law's superstitious suggestions to "cleanse" our marriage and financial affairs. I am tempted to think maybe we SHOULD have, but it is only a temptation. Your counsel is all we feel comfortable with. We have not ever asked any priest or counselor over these many years for help concerning a possible "curse" because we feared ridicule. So, It is NOT only in the "recent past" ,as he says, that we have had bad financial luck--it is just that only the "recent past" is ALL my husband can remember. He is SO overwhelmed. I suppose this was cathartic, since the advice you already gave he will follow. I TOLD him to do the 7 steps, but he wanted to get it from you. It is also a psychological AND spiritual fact that people need to connect with someone else for confirmation and relief. Sometimes we can't believe the stuff that occurs, so telling someone else helps. MY question is: could any of this be considered "purgative"? What I mean, is that BEFORE I got married, I prayed this prayer out of great desire for God that I wanted to spend my life as a purgatory (I have sinned along the way). Could a rash of bad luck be a purgative thing?Would God include my husband in this? My Mom says I am being "self-centered" in thinking this, that God would NEVER do that.
Question Answered by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OMSM(r) Dear Lisara: There is an old saying, "Be careful what you pray for, you may get it." I know one priest who prayed for humility. He got it. He was unjustly accused of wrongdoing. Yes, all the trials and tribulations we suffer through in this life are purgative in the general sense. To volunteer oneself to a purgatorial life, however, is more than general, it is a laudable act, if done with humility. It is possible to offer oneself for prideful reasons—to garner attention or for ego satisfaction. We have all witnessed people who "milk" their ailements for attention. The same is possible in the religious realm. But, an Act to volunteer oneself to suffer here on earth to reduce our time in purgatory, when offered in humility, is a good and laudable act that God accepts. As worthy as this laudable act is, there is another similar act that is heroic. And heroic act is: An act of charity by which a person offers to God, for the benefit of the souls in purgatory, all the works of satisfaction he or she will perform during life, and all the suffrage that will come to him or her after death. It is not a vow but an offering that can be revoked at will. Its heroism consists in the readiness to undergo sufferings here and in purgatory in order to relieve others of their purgatorial pains. The Church has more than once approved such a heroic act of charity. [Source: Catholic Dictionary] Whichever Act one offers, laudable or heroic, most people will not undertstand it and try to dissuade you from making the act, ridicule you for offering the act, or accuse your motivations. That is the nature of things. Jesus said this would happen. Just consider it part of the moritifcation required of the Act. As for your husband, he receives the general purgatorial benefits that anyone receives through the trials and tribulations in his life. In order for him to enjoy the added benefits of an Laudible Act, or a Heroic Act, he must make the offer to God himself. You cannot do it for him. As for your mother, I think she is perhaps misunderstanding the issue. If she thinks that God imposes the suffering, then your mother is right, God does not do that. God does not employ trials and tribulations upon his children. Rather he makes lemonade out if the lemons in our life (Rom 8:28). What we are talking about here is something that we offer to God on our own initiative. God accepts our initiative to offer a Laudible or Heroic Act, to spend our purgatory here on earth, or to apply to others the benefits we receive from our own sufferings. But, God does not impose those sufferings. God Bless, Bro. Ignatius Mary For information on how to receive help see our Help page. We suggest that before contacting us directly for help you try the Seven Steps to Self-Deliverance. These self-help steps will often resolve the problem. Also our Spiritual Warfare Prayer Catalog contains many prayers that may be helpful. If needed you can ask for a Personal Consultation.

Question Title

Posted By

Question Date

re: being cursed

Lisara

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Question:

Happy New Year--I pray you are well and only getting better!

The person who wrote you this e-mail is my husband. I want to clarify and expand on his e-mail AND I thought I would ask you something in regards to this.

It is a bit embarassing to just assume it is "a curse" right off the bat. First of all my husband is extremely unimaginative AND forgetful, and this time I say this in his defense---he only likes facts, eventhough he does go have faith and goes to church regularly.

We have been married 22 years. We have lived through 22 years of many financial trials (extortion, scams and cons, theft by clients and co-workers, foreclosures), which sounds mundane, but along with bad health, family problems ( I have written about them), and he is losing most of his teeth ewhich we can't afford to fix. There are a whole host of other things, but I CAN'T write them. He seems to put them out of his mind as a defense-mechanism. I can't though I wish I could.

Now please understand, we NEVER (neither he nor I) wanted to ever believe in a "curse". The idea had been planted in our consciousness about 15 years ago by his Mom and Dad, and even my parents. We thought it was hogwash, and superstition.

His Mom though had an "herbal shop" for many years which attracted many superstitious and magic practioners. They regarded her as a "guru" which she denied as a fact; she never regarded herself as such. It was well-known that her son was(is) a lawyer, and she always feared people would envy this and hurt him. He ALSO had clients that were visitors of his Mom's shop. One even told him 15 years ago that she "would make sure he never had a good business".

We resisted ALL of Mother-in-law's superstitious suggestions to "cleanse" our marriage and financial affairs. I am tempted to think maybe we SHOULD have, but it is only a temptation. Your counsel is all we feel comfortable with. We have not ever asked any priest or counselor over these many years for help concerning a possible "curse" because we feared ridicule.

So, It is NOT only in the "recent past" ,as he says, that we have had bad financial luck--it is just that only the "recent past" is ALL my husband can remember. He is SO overwhelmed.

I suppose this was cathartic, since the advice you already gave he will follow. I TOLD him to do the 7 steps, but he wanted to get it from you. It is also a psychological AND spiritual fact that people need to connect with someone else for confirmation and relief. Sometimes we can't believe the stuff that occurs, so telling someone else helps.

MY question is: could any of this be considered "purgative"? What I mean, is that BEFORE I got married, I prayed this prayer out of great desire for God that I wanted to spend my life as a purgatory (I have sinned along the way). Could a rash of bad luck be a purgative thing?Would God include my husband in this? My Mom says I am being "self-centered" in thinking this, that God would NEVER do that.

Question Answered by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OMSM(r)

Dear Lisara:

There is an old saying, "Be careful what you pray for, you may get it."

I know one priest who prayed for humility. He got it. He was unjustly accused of wrongdoing.

Yes, all the trials and tribulations we suffer through in this life are purgative in the general sense. To volunteer oneself to a purgatorial life, however, is more than general, it is a laudable act, if done with humility.

It is possible to offer oneself for prideful reasons—to garner attention or for ego satisfaction. We have all witnessed people who "milk" their ailements for attention. The same is possible in the religious realm.

But, an Act to volunteer oneself to suffer here on earth to reduce our time in purgatory, when offered in humility, is a good and laudable act that God accepts.

As worthy as this laudable act is, there is another similar act that is heroic.

And heroic act is:

An act of charity by which a person offers to God, for the benefit of the souls in purgatory, all the works of satisfaction he or she will perform during life, and all the suffrage that will come to him or her after death. It is not a vow but an offering that can be revoked at will. Its heroism consists in the readiness to undergo sufferings here and in purgatory in order to relieve others of their purgatorial pains. The Church has more than once approved such a heroic act of charity. [Source: Catholic Dictionary]

Whichever Act one offers, laudable or heroic, most people will not undertstand it and try to dissuade you from making the act, ridicule you for offering the act, or accuse your motivations. That is the nature of things. Jesus said this would happen. Just consider it part of the moritifcation required of the Act.

As for your husband, he receives the general purgatorial benefits that anyone receives through the trials and tribulations in his life. In order for him to enjoy the added benefits of an Laudible Act, or a Heroic Act, he must make the offer to God himself. You cannot do it for him.

As for your mother, I think she is perhaps misunderstanding the issue. If she thinks that God imposes the suffering, then your mother is right, God does not do that. God does not employ trials and tribulations upon his children. Rather he makes lemonade out if the lemons in our life (Rom 8:28).

What we are talking about here is something that we offer to God on our own initiative. God accepts our initiative to offer a Laudible or Heroic Act, to spend our purgatory here on earth, or to apply to others the benefits we receive from our own sufferings. But, God does not impose those sufferings.

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary

For information on how to receive help see our Help page. We suggest that before contacting us directly for help you try the Seven Steps to Self-Deliverance. These self-help steps will often resolve the problem. Also our Spiritual Warfare Prayer Catalog contains many prayers that may be helpful. If needed you can ask for a Personal Consultation.