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Question Title	Posted By	Question Date
Can we confess our family sins	Teresa	Sunday, January 20, 2013
Question: I have been confronted with all memories related to sexual,physical emotional and spiritual abuse. Some by my family members and some by others. Some by my self. I went to confession and accused myself of being an active perticipant in such abuse and taking responsability for not saying anything. I then was inspired to begin to confess the sins of my family and I said somebody needs to ask forgiveness for these sins committed. I did this in the spirit of allowing my self to truthfully forgive the people in my family who have hurt me. The confessor listened. I asked him if I could confess sins of my family he did not say anything while I went down the list incest, domestic violence, affairs, child abuse, alcohol and drug abuse. I did sense a release of my unforgiveness. I was then encouraged to pray for my family last night. This helped me to forgive them although I do still have the PTSD and all the emotions and behaviors associated with them. I however felt more at peace. So can we do that in confession confess our families sins ? There was an aided understanding of how immense of the need to forgive and in time to forget. Are there prayers in your catalog of prayers asking to bring your family to forgiveness? I also confessed the innate desire of suicide in which I can honestly have had since age 13 but I am now addressing this with my confessor God's representative and counseling. Are there prayers to specifically combat these temptations of self destruction, suicidal tendencies, despair? As this I believe offends God the most. It has taken a while to accept where I am and God wants to bring it out of me. I am worried because my priest friend committed suicide and he was in the service of God how much more I am in such more danger. I am not suicidal per se just feel it or think it and that is a norm for me for a while but I am dealing with it. Is this psychological or is it more in which I need to do besides what you have told me to do in previous questions? This is a question is this a sin in its self to think suicide or feel to do it even though you do not act on it? My confessor knew I was seeing a counselor and he just told me to keep going to counseling. Can I receive the Eucharist if I had those thoughts or feelings? Thank you for your honest and objective answers!
Question Answered by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OMSM(r) Dear Teresa: You keep mentioning your priest friend who killed himself. His suicide has absolutely nothing to do with you. You need to stop placing significance on this as it pertains to you. Obviously, this priest had psychological problems. Being a priest, or even a Pope, does not make one immune from psychological problems. They are humans like the rest of us and are susceptible to sin just as much as any of us. So, you need to stop thinking about this priest and especially stop making comparisons between him and you. There is no comparison, there is no connection, there is no significance concerning his suicide and you. Whenever you have thoughts of suicide, you need to rebuke those thoughts. I mentioned this in the last post. Any unwanted thoughts of any kind should be rebuked and rebuked each and every time the thoughts come to you. Unwanted thoughts are not sin. Just rebuke them and think about something else. Yes, you can receive the Eucharist if you are in a state of grace. Thoughts and feelings of suicide is not grave sin. Thus, do not avoid the Eucharist because of these thoughts. In fact, ask God to heal you of these thoughts as you receive the Eucharist. The Eucharist is a very healing Sacrament and also can strengthen you in your faith and in your ability to rebuke such thoughts We cannot confess other people's sins in the sense of the Sacrament of Confession on their behalf. A person is forgiven only if they confess their sins themselves; nobody can do it for them. What you describe, however, is confessing family sins in the sense of "revealing" family sins, saying them out loud, in order for you to forgive them. This is healthy. We cannot really begin to forgive unless we speak (confess means to "disclose") the existence of the sin. As you experienced, when you revealed the family sins, a healing in you began, forgiveness came over you, and the spirit of unforgiveness was released from you. Praise God! Evil must be brought into the light of day, into the healing light of God's grace. That is what happened to you when you revealed the family secrets, the family sins. This is the beginning of healing and forgiveness. We must always forgive everyone for everything. But, in terms of those family members who sinned, they cannot be restored to a state of Grace unless they personally come to God and ask for forgiveness. God is ready to forgive anytime those family members choose to come to Him to repent and ask Him for forgiveness. We can pray that those family members, who have not taken responsibility for their sin and thereby asked God for forgiveness, may do so someday before it is too late. Also, remember, when you confess your personal sins in the Sacrament of Confession, those sins are removed from the universe, they no longer exist, God remembers them no more. Thus, do not carry around a burden for past sins that no longer exist (1 John 1:9). We are praying for you. God Bless, Bro. Ignatius Mary For information on how to receive help see our Help page. We suggest that before contacting us directly for help you try the Seven Steps to Self-Deliverance. These self-help steps will often resolve the problem. Also our Spiritual Warfare Prayer Catalog contains many prayers that may be helpful. If needed you can ask for a Personal Consultation.

Question Title

Posted By

Question Date

Can we confess our family sins

Teresa

Sunday, January 20, 2013

Question:

I have been confronted with all memories related to sexual,physical emotional and spiritual abuse. Some by my family members and some by others. Some by my self. I went to confession and accused myself of being an active perticipant in such abuse and taking responsability for not saying anything. I then was inspired to begin to confess the sins of my family and I said somebody needs to ask forgiveness for these sins committed. I did this in the spirit of allowing my self to truthfully forgive the people in my family who have hurt me. The confessor listened.

I asked him if I could confess sins of my family he did not say anything while I went down the list incest, domestic violence, affairs, child abuse, alcohol and drug abuse. I did sense a release of my unforgiveness. I was then encouraged to pray for my family last night.

This helped me to forgive them although I do still have the PTSD and all the emotions and behaviors associated with them. I however felt more at peace.

So can we do that in confession confess our families sins ? There was an aided understanding of how immense of the need to forgive and in time to forget. Are there prayers in your catalog of prayers asking to bring your family to forgiveness?

I also confessed the innate desire of suicide in which I can honestly have had since age 13 but I am now addressing this with my confessor God's representative and counseling. Are there prayers to specifically combat these temptations of self destruction, suicidal tendencies, despair? As this I believe offends God the most.

It has taken a while to accept where I am and God wants to bring it out of me. I am worried because my priest friend committed suicide and he was in the service of God how much more I am in such more danger. I am not suicidal per se just feel it or think it and that is a norm for me for a while but I am dealing with it.

Is this psychological or is it more in which I need to do besides what you have told me to do in previous questions? This is a question is this a sin in its self to think suicide or feel to do it even though you do not act on it? My confessor knew I was seeing a counselor and he just told me to keep going to counseling. Can I receive the Eucharist if I had those thoughts or feelings?

Thank you for your honest and objective answers!

Question Answered by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OMSM(r)

Dear Teresa:

You keep mentioning your priest friend who killed himself. His suicide has absolutely nothing to do with you. You need to stop placing significance on this as it pertains to you. Obviously, this priest had psychological problems. Being a priest, or even a Pope, does not make one immune from psychological problems. They are humans like the rest of us and are susceptible to sin just as much as any of us. So, you need to stop thinking about this priest and especially stop making comparisons between him and you. There is no comparison, there is no connection, there is no significance concerning his suicide and you.

Whenever you have thoughts of suicide, you need to rebuke those thoughts. I mentioned this in the last post. Any unwanted thoughts of any kind should be rebuked and rebuked each and every time the thoughts come to you. Unwanted thoughts are not sin. Just rebuke them and think about something else.

Yes, you can receive the Eucharist if you are in a state of grace. Thoughts and feelings of suicide is not grave sin. Thus, do not avoid the Eucharist because of these thoughts. In fact, ask God to heal you of these thoughts as you receive the Eucharist. The Eucharist is a very healing Sacrament and also can strengthen you in your faith and in your ability to rebuke such thoughts

We cannot confess other people's sins in the sense of the Sacrament of Confession on their behalf. A person is forgiven only if they confess their sins themselves; nobody can do it for them.

What you describe, however, is confessing family sins in the sense of "revealing" family sins, saying them out loud, in order for you to forgive them. This is healthy. We cannot really begin to forgive unless we speak (confess means to "disclose") the existence of the sin.

As you experienced, when you revealed the family sins, a healing in you began, forgiveness came over you, and the spirit of unforgiveness was released from you.

Praise God!

Evil must be brought into the light of day, into the healing light of God's grace. That is what happened to you when you revealed the family secrets, the family sins. This is the beginning of healing and forgiveness. We must always forgive everyone for everything.

But, in terms of those family members who sinned, they cannot be restored to a state of Grace unless they personally come to God and ask for forgiveness. God is ready to forgive anytime those family members choose to come to Him to repent and ask Him for forgiveness. We can pray that those family members, who have not taken responsibility for their sin and thereby asked God for forgiveness, may do so someday before it is too late.

Also, remember, when you confess your personal sins in the Sacrament of Confession, those sins are removed from the universe, they no longer exist, God remembers them no more. Thus, do not carry around a burden for past sins that no longer exist (1 John 1:9).

We are praying for you.

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary

For information on how to receive help see our Help page. We suggest that before contacting us directly for help you try the Seven Steps to Self-Deliverance. These self-help steps will often resolve the problem. Also our Spiritual Warfare Prayer Catalog contains many prayers that may be helpful. If needed you can ask for a Personal Consultation.