Dear Lisa:

I am sorry that you were hurt. God loves you so much. Look to our Lord for healing and grace according to whatever He has for you. He know what you need and when you need it.

There is a "healing of memories" that one can do. There is a brief article by Father John Bartunek entitled, How Do I Deal with Pain from the Past?  His suggestions are about the same as I use in spiritual counseling. 

We also use some of the material from Fr John Hampsch. 

The Healing of Memories most often is associated with a Healing of the Family Tree. Here is material on how to do a geneogram to Heal the Family Tree (zip file).

Fr. Pat Crowley, a colleague of mine in the Association of Christian Therapists. has an excellent prayer for the healing of memories.

The long and short of it is to rest in the arms of our Lord. Let the past be in the past and live in the here-and-now. Forgive and get on with your life. Unforgiveness does nothing to the abuser, it only hurts us. What is in the past cannot be changed, but you can change how you respond to the past and what you will do from here on in your life. 

We sometimes get ourselves into thinking errors holding ourselves responsible for the actions of others. Those who have hurt you are responsible for their sins. You are not to blame for their actions.

If our past memories involve sins of our own, remember that when we confess our sins, those sins no longer exist in the universe. God has forgotten those forgiven sins. If God has forgotten our past forgiven sins, who are we to remember them (that is, to continue to fret over them)?

Fretting over the past is actually a form of Pride. We want to be justified or any host of other desires about the past. This is pride because it is about our wants, our desires for justice, justifications, and sometimes even revenge. It is pride because it demands to know why, to understand. Much of the time we will never know why. Evil does not have to have a reason. To demand that we know why and to understand is the pride of intellect. 

We must learn to let go if we desire to be free from the bondage of the past. Our focus must be on humility, forgiveness, living in the here-and-now, getting on with your life, and most importantly, keep in your eyes on Jesus and resting in his arms.

We have pamphlets (all pdf files) to help with pride (also the Litany of Humility), forgiveness, and with Resigning Oneself to Christ (resting in his arms). Healing is not possible unless we do these things.

If necessary, for those who hold strong obsessions or compulsive thoughts about the past, seeking help from a good Christian mental health professional may be needed. In addition, there is medication that can help with obsessive or compulsive thoughts, if needed.

We will be praying for you.

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary